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  • vampyr 2109

Image is everythin, thirst is nothin..... or is it


A long time ago, as many people did, and still do, I gave a damn bout image. To a certain extent I still do, but now for different reasons

I grew my goatee long... cuz 'm a metal fan and that what metal fans looked like right? I wore nothing but black, because that's what gothic metal fans do apparently!

I did all this for the shock of it, walking round town was like a biblical scene, parting the oceans as I walk through the crowd,

In later life i grew twin mohawks.. (think firestarter) dyed them bright colours, again done for the shock of it.

I got piercings, several infact, again, the image was to shock, or get a reaction of some sort

Image was everything to me, I loved hearing and seeing peoples reaction to how I looked, but in this i found myself to be an outcast, not belonging to any group, even the other 'freaks' shunned me, I was alone, yes its good to have your own identity but in later years I regretted this. Whats the point in having your own views and take on things when there's no-one else to share these points with.

These day I'm finding myself buying and wearing more regular stuff, buying more recognised brandings, dre beats, superdry etc etc, I do this not to 'fit' in, but to blend in, I'm no longer that person who wants a reaction, these days i just want to go unnoticed, and live my life in relative peace and quiet, but in doing this I have found people more willing to pay attention to my viewpoints and ideas, they are still the same as when I was a 'freak'.

Due to where I'v been for a year I no longer have the piercings or haircut, I do miss them, but not for its image of shock, but for more personal reasoning's

Everywhere I look I see unique looking people and miss those days, I'm a different person now though, wanting to blend in so to avoid any confrontation as I know with my mental health i could do something I may regret

This is not a rant at how bad being unique is, it's a good thing, we are all individual, and some like to outwardly show it, they may even find a group that they can connect with, but for me that wasn't the case, this post is merely me saying I miss those days, but I have to live in the now, and not look back

so I ask you, is image important to you? does it make you feel good how you look, or do you just blend in for whatever reason


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